If you subscribe to this blog, you’ve probably realized that I don’t post super-often. Life is incredibly hectic, I have a lot of thoughts, but no time to share them…
We got a puppy. A straight friend got a puppy from the same litter, so we went to the breeder on the same day to pick them up. She’s known us for a while and is totally accepting of us, I’ve always been completely comfortable with her.
We were in the backyard sitting in the grass and our puppy grabbed our friend’s pants by the butt to play, and my partner laughed and said ‘Oh, look, he’s an ass man, just like me.’
Our friend laughed but also blushed and immediately said ‘TMI! TMI!’ and the conversation went on to other things.
Alone later, my partner said ‘you know, if I had been a straight guy no one would have batted an eye at me saying that’
And I thought about it, and she’s right. Straight people say that sort of thing all the time and it’s chuckled over and that’s it. When I lived as perceived straight, I remember a number of conversations that way. I know that if a straight chick says ‘I’m into asses’ her friend might counter with ‘I’m into smooth backs’ or whatever, but not TMI! If a guy says he’s an ass man women roll their eyes at best.
So why this reaction? And why from a friend? I thought about it and I think it’s the same old thing that comes back to haunt us. I’m fine with you being gay, just don’t flaunt it. Mentioning being into asses and they can’t pretend that we’re asexual beings who just enjoy each other’s company.
We’ve come a long way, we still have a long way to go…
